Car horoscope for the week of July 9-15

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  1. Auto horoscope from 9 to 15 July
    • Aries
    • Taurus
    • Twins
    • Cancer
    • a lion
    • Virgo
    • scales
    • Scorpion
    • Sagittarius
    • Capricorn
    • Aquarius
    • Fishes


Heavenly luminaries sympathize with the drivers and advise not to worry about the petrol lawlessness and other road troubles - the chauffeur fraternity will not be broken, we will still taxi and will be covered in chocolate. But until we get to the ideal tracks and cheap gas stations, let's try to enjoy the present. Moreover, in this July period the world celebrates the Day of Chocolate. So that's why the traffic cops are in a dirty uniform, and shiny wrappers are lying around the guard houses - they thought of taking fines with chocolates, in such-and-such hot weather. In general, the stars illuminate our path and wish everyone a happy journey, strong nerves and good companions.

Auto horoscope from 9 to 15 July

Aries

Aries, stellar traffic cops salute you and advise you not to mess with earthly patrol guys - the guys from the traffic police are twitchy these days. Maybe they were overeating or undernourished, or they received a scolding from the authorities - it's better not to risk it. Take the roundabout paths to the river - the country roads are not ideal, but there are no checkpoints, and there are no traffic jams. At the same time, celebrate the national holiday Nettle Conjuration - they say that this herb attracts money and protects from the evil eye. Pull on some nettles in reserve and stuff a full trunk - your iron horse doesn't mind. Just don't put it in the glove compartment - you have too curious passengers, they will suddenly burn themselves, then you will have to go to pharmacies and look for ointment.

Taurus

Taurus, the traffic situation in these July days is developing in such a way that it is better to go on a trip on foot. At the same time, you will communicate with pedestrians, otherwise you have already forgotten how they move and what they are interested in. Although, the desires of the two-legged are simple and understandable - they would run across the zebra and not hear the affectionate words addressed to them. By the way, be careful and don't step on cats - pussies of all stripes are pacing somewhere with a proud look. Almost 150 years ago, the first cat show was held in London - so the animals are celebrating. Traffic cops are also not lagging behind - they shine and purr with happiness (well, of course, why shouldn't they be happy, they probably stopped a dozen well-fed mice in jeeps).

Twins

Gemini, stars alarmedly whisper "guard" and advise you not to enter a puddle that somehow got in your way. This is not a puddle, but a whole lake - perhaps there are also water ones with mermaids there. In general, the conclusion - go around the obstacles, and this July week will pass with a plus sign. If you meet disheveled guys in shorts and T-shirts and with balls in their hands, you better slow down - these are the fans. They celebrate a football holiday - the first FIFA World Cup began in Uruguay already 88 years ago. Think of some sports chant and go further, but don't give a lift to the fans - it suddenly turns out that you are rooting for the wrong team, and besides, your delicate machine does not tolerate noise and fuss.

Cancer

Crayfish, eh, and the hard work of the driver, and every day is like hard labor - do not pay attention to the cork whiners and admire the scenery. Enjoy the view of undulating and bumpy roads, look at cute traffic cops, wave your hand to modest road butterflies - beauty, and that's all. By the way, about the traffic cops - the patrol guys these July days are not like themselves. At the posts, whoever you will not meet - there are woodcutters, and bogeymen, and even the great and terrible Goodwins. Well done guys, do not forget children's fairy tales and celebrate the birthday of a wonderful person Alexander Volkov. But the passage to the Emerald City, alas, is closed, and the yellow brick roads have disappeared somewhere.

A lion

Lions, cunning traffic cops, cunning refuellers, mischievous repairmen. The negative road list can be continued indefinitely, but the stars decided not to torment the drivers of your sign - slow down at the nearest forest. Look for mushrooms or berries while this business has not yet been taxed, at the same time celebrate the July folk holiday David Strawberry (throw a couple of strawberry leaves into the glove compartment to prevent the evil eye). But do not leave your favorite car for a long time - your iron horse hates loneliness. It will also begin to squeak and overflow, mushroom pickers with baskets will run together, and foresters with guns will catch up - you will have to work as a cab driver and take everyone home.

Virgo

Virgo, do not pay attention to the traffic cops who wander with a lost look and interrogate every second driver - maybe they are looking for yesterday or trying to find out who took the Bastille. Yes, none of the drivers took it, just the guys from the traffic police did not learn history in their time and do not know about the beginning of the French Revolution, and they never heard of the Bastille prison - tell them about the important summer date. On the other hand, all the patrolmen had A's in mathematics - even machines for counting money are not needed, everything is done manually and manually. But the stars are distracted again - go to a cool, cozy garage, sit in a shabby comfortable chair and talk with an iron horse about the events in Paris.

Scales

Libra, the blue ball is spinning, the gray path winds, and only you are driving straight on these summer days and do not turn anywhere. Stop for at least an hour and have a snack in a cafe - you need a bun with tea, and a tired iron horse needs a break. But do not pay attention to suspicious fellows in caps who stare with their eyes and now and then get red crusts from their pockets. This is not a new road patrol, but just fans of the NKVD - this office was created on a July day 84 years ago in the USSR. Don't worry, the black funnel won't drive up, although something is getting dark in the bushes - maybe a car, or maybe some uncle disguised as a chimney sweep (your machine won't let him in).

Scorpion

Scorpions, you do not steer there, you steer here, otherwise the traffic cop will wave his wand, you will be completely sad. On these July days, you better trust your typewriter - no, not the navigator (this thing is lying, be healthy). And the iron horse will take you where you want, even with a breeze, and with comfort. On the roads in this summer period, a real joke - and not in a figurative, but in a literal sense. Even the patrol guys dance and sing about boys and girls, as well as about their parents. Everyone celebrates Elena Kamburova's birthday - it was her lovely voice that sounded at the beginning of the Yeralash program. But roll on, otherwise the insidious DPS nicknames will distract you with their incendiary dances and even be fined on the sly.

Sagittarius

Sagittarius, there will be no gasoline, oil has run out - this phrase is becoming more and more real. But stop, the stars say, because on these summer days it is a shame to be sad. Take an example from your cheerful wheelbarrow, and most importantly, do not look into the sad eyes of the traffic cops - suddenly you will regret the traffic guards and inadvertently give them all the money. Better pay attention to the activated Chinese. Fear not, they will not offer noodles and slippers, because the guys are celebrating the day on which the Chinese Terracotta Army was found, made to guard the tomb of the emperor. The figures of the warriors are well preserved - oh, if there was such an attitude towards road construction, we would not know any problems at all.

Capricorn

Capricorns, do not grumble at the reckless drivers, do not swear at the officials, do not be angry with the traffic cops - everything is in place, and the road harmony has not gone anywhere. But it would be nice for you to hide - turn into the first lane you come across - soon steep cars with important bumps will rush along the tracks. Maybe the high-ranking guys went to the beach or just decided to boo and surprise the people.But if you get stuck in a traffic jam, then do not be surprised when lovely ladies look through the window and offer tea, water and chicken in a container. These are the flight attendants celebrating the day of the civil aviation flight attendant. And why they can't sit in heaven - maybe they were seasick, or they decided to earn some money during the holiday.

Aquarius

Aquarians, in these July days, the drivers of your sign will forget that brevity is the sister of talent - you will want to speak out. And it doesn't even matter whose ears will be - you are ready to shine with eloquence in the company of traffic cops, and in a crowd of drivers, and even among harmful pedestrians. You, most importantly, do not discuss with summer residents, otherwise they will hang you noodles mixed with fresh strawberries and overgrown radishes. Yes, and check the wipers - that they were waving, it seems that there is no rain, maybe they are hinting that it's time to wash. After the water procedures, stop near the grannies selling yellow eggs - the old women do not have sclerosis, and they celebrate not Easter, but the national holiday of the Twelve Apostles.

Fishes

Fish, traffic cops in these July days are head-handed, pedestrians bow-legged - in general, everything is not as it should be (it is good at least the zebras have not been repainted orange). Change the track and drive in a different, quieter place - the car does not mind, it is also tired of dust and hot weather. By the way, do not be alarmed if instead of the usual thin blondes you see plump ladies behind the wheel. Autolady celebrate Rembrandt's birthday, and the artist, as you know, loved magnificent models. Your iron horse is also quite well-fed - this is what a kind and caring owner means (and do not forget to refresh yourself, otherwise you will again rummage in the glove compartment and look for dried sweets).

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